Citing “conflicting schedules” and “no infidelity” Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian announced yesterday that they were breaking up.
So Reggies plays football in the NFL, understandable that he has stuff to do. And Kim, well Kim is a ..or she does…I mean, wait SHE DOESN’T DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What could possible conflict with her schedule of rubbing cellulite cream on her ass, that Paris Hilton once so eloquently called “a trashbag filled with cottage cheese”???
Oh Kimmy-poo this really puts a dent into your whole “im a curvy size 2″ statement now doesn’t it.
Kim’s dumbass commented on a clipping from Us Magazine that featured her pic next to a new plus-size line by Forever 21:
I am a huge fan of Forever 21 and I’m very happy they have expanded their line to include a plus-size range, but I am not in that size category and this article makes it sound like I am! I am a curvy girl and I love my curves, but curvy and plus-sized are two very different things. I work really hard to maintain my curves while staying slim and healthy, so to be classed as a “fuller-figured woman” of extra large proportions is a little offensive.
For the record, I am a size 2, not 2XL.
Sorry sweetie, nobody’s buying it.
Kim Kardashian has taken time off from her busy life to spend some days vacationing in Mexico with her family (heavy sarcasm).
She posted this picture on her Twitter page soliciting the help of her Twitter followers after having fallen asleep with big sunglasses on and burning her precious face to a crisp.
I think I speak for lots of people when I say that after seeing this picture I felt a warm sensation of satisfaction throughout my entire body.
Forget about praying day and night that your fat jiggly ass cottage cheese thighs would disappear and you could keep eating your 24 piece bucket o fried chicken and glazed donuts every day that you dipped in mayonnaise, because now with photoshop even the lardiest of lard asses can look fit.
Behold Kim Kardashian’s ass.
Case closed.
You wish Kourtney Kardashian.
When asked if she and her fugly ass sister Chloe would follow in the less fugly sister Kim’s footstep and pose for Playboy together, the obviously delusional Kourtney said the following:
“Although we would be flattered, no one has even asked us.
“I don’t know where this rumour has sparked from.”
She then said: “We would be the brunette version of The Girls Next Door!”
Brunette version? Chloe Kardashian is a gorilla! That shit would be the fake tittay version of Planet of the Apes.
Kim Kardashian was succesfully anorexicfied for her GQ photo shoot with Reggie Bush.
Not bad photoshop, we applaud you. Not every person is able to shave 50 pounds off of somebody’s ass instantly.
Well done.
When you have to be helped to stuff yourself into a dress you should draw the following conclusions:
1. You are probably too fat to get into the dress, thus should not be trying it on in the first place.
2. You are pathetic,
Kim Kardashian picked the smallest dress in the shop then made her child slave stuff her into it with the threat of not feeding it for the next month if they didn’t make it fit. Upon countless attempts the paramedics had to be called and Kim was removed with the jaws of life.
The slave child was sent back to Vietnam.
